When God Can't Win (With Us)

Lately my girlfriend has become a sort of therapist, in that I tend to vent and complain and occasionally curse my way about explaining a theological concept. Usually, this goes over pretty well.

I had a brief discussion with a friend about violence within the Old Testament. Normally, I have no real problem with it and I still don't. But thinking about the idea of promise and marriage and the future involvement of humanity makes for strange bedfellows.

I do wonder about what man truly desires, in that we had so much. I cannot image a "good" or "perfect" relationship with Allison or my parents or my friends.

The very idea is terrifying in that it seems to presuppose some sort of intimacy and openness that, frankly, I don't like. Where wounds are stripped away and you are left bare and alone in the night where all that is you is there.

That scares me. If I knew I could have a perfect relationship with my human friends, the prospect of a very big God being completely open and relational makes me tremble.

George MacDonald said:

Man finds it hard to get what he wants, because he does not want the best; God finds it hard to give, because He would give the best, and man will not take it.

In some ways, I think this is sadly true. I do wonder about God's emotions and passion for humanity, and what truly pleases him. What is the best we can do but pale in comparison?

What is nerve-wracking about the "best" there is?

--Nick